The mark my dog left behind and a video you HAVE to watch

Plus always a book review

The stains on my stairs

There is a barely perceptible mark on each of our steps, a square of flooring that was covered for so long it lost its colour. It’s a stain so consistent and uniform on each step it looks like a pattern in the floor boards. But the discolouration is more than a mark, it’s a little piece of my heart and I am about to lose it.

Next month our renovation starts, the staircase will be pulled out to make place for a new one, the kitchen will be moved, some walls will be lost and new ones gained. I know the house is going to be amazing, but I will miss those stairs

I remember my husband going to buy the very ugly carpet squares that stained the stairs. Our dog, Henry was getting old and he was having difficulty with the stairs, he couldn’t grip like he used to and the vet suggested carpet would be easier for him. I don’t know why we didn’t carpet the whole house, that’s the kind of dog owners we were, but laying carpet squares on the steps just for Henry was easier/cheaper and quicker.

Henry trotted up and down those little carpet squares for years, the vet was right - they really did make it much easier for him. But they were not pretty, nor did they look like they belonged, so I removed them shortly after Henry died.

I didn’t realise until now, how visible he was is in the stains from those carpet squares and when those stairs go, that physical reminder of his existence will also be gone. It’s another tiny Henry loss that feels like a lot for my stressed-about-moving and petrified-of-world-events head to deal with. Thankfully I have memories of him everywhere, his paw prints at my front door and tattooed on my ankle, his photos everywhere, even his ashes made into dubious artworks, but mostly in my heart where I carry him very close to the surface.

Look for the helpers

I have always longed to be the kind of person who could say optimistic and comforting things in time of crisis, like Fred Rogers who famously said “When I was a boy and I would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping.” (On reflection maybe his mother should get the credit…)

Right now the news is overwhelming and hideous and the fires in LA look like the end of the world. It’s hard to see any light but then this lands in your Instagram feed and it’s like Fred Roger’s mother is there pointing out the good in people. Try watching this without crying happy tears.

weratedogs

A post shared by @weratedogs

Would You Rather

You read a lot about para social relationships and you think ‘that’s weird how can you have a relationship with someone you don’t know?’ And then you pick up a book by your good friend

Maggie Alderson

and realise she’s actually not your friend, you’ve just been following her for ages - in her column in the Sunday papers years ago, on Instagram and then on Substack. It’s safe to say that even though Maggie doesn’t know I’m her friend (or indeed that I exist) I have always loved her writing and picking up one of her novels feels comfortable and safe - like pulling on a soft, warm jumper in the cold.

Would You Rather tells the story of Sophie whose husband dies hours after telling her he is leaving her to start a life with another woman which leaves her as a grieving widow… or a woman whose husband has just been dumped after almost thirty years of marriage. She chooses not to tell anyone what happened and must live with this combination of rage and sadness while finding herself newly single.

The story is easy to read, beautifully relatable in that the main character is a woman of a certain age (my age) and full of intrigue and plot. But mostly it’s an escape into the life of a family that is affected by grief and betrayal and how they manage the secrets they carry. It’s effortlessly told and easy to read and cements the reason Maggie and I are such good friends, er I mean the reason I love reading Maggie Alderson’s work.

Food

I was reading through this article from The New York Times on food trends for 2025 and while I had no issue with it being a year of sauces I did balk at this new iteration of coffee “Chefs are infusing coffee with sunchoke puree and avocado…” I won’t even finish that quote because by now you are rinsing out your mouth anyway. Suffice it to say that this pretentious paragraph ends with the line “And yes, coffee is starting to get the omakase treatment in which customers are offered several courses of the drink in various presentations.“ Sometimes less really is more *sips on instant coffee*

On the eating front - I think I may have perfected the art of frying halloumi cheese by soaking the halloumi for half an hour before frying it. Seems to be less rubbery, or maybe in the past I have just been really bad at overcooking the cheese. Anyway just a heads up to give that a try if you’re into fried cheese and really why wouldn’t you be?

Speaking of cheese - this is most definitely on my to try list but first I have to purchase all the lact-eze in the world.

sivanskitchen

A post shared by @sivanskitchen

Thanks for reading, hope that you are safe and healthy with a good book and something delicious to eat. Don’t forget to like this post (and subscribe if you haven’t yet)

See you next week

Lana